Changing Tides
by AleutianStorm
Summary: Crosby Leveen starts to see his childhood friend in a new light after she comes to stay with him after fleeing an abusive marriage. A Deadliest Catch fic.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

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Chapter 1: A New Beginning

"Ladies and gentlemen, the captain has illuminated the seat belt sign. Please return to your seats, fasten your seat belts and make sure your seat back is in the upright and locked position as we begin our final descent into Seattle," came the flight attendant's voice over the loudspeaker.

Arianne Graves took a deep breath and tried, for the hundredth time today, to calm her shattered nerves. She had finally done it. She had left her abusive husband Jason and was headed to Seattle to start a new life with the help of her old friend, Crosby Leveen. She had known Crosby and his sisters, Sarah and Quinn since they were all kids growing up in the same neighborhood in Manchester, Maine. The Leveen kids were her constant companions then. She had idolized his older sisters and Crosby had been her best friend all through high school and the early part of college, when she'd met Jason Graves. Jason hadn't approved of her close relationship with Crosby, so to make Jason happy, she'd slowly cut him out of her life. She wished she would have known that Jason had already begun his abuse by isolating her from her friends. It had only gotten worse. A lot worse.

It had been a fluke that she'd run into Crosby's sister, Quinn, at a Starbucks in Manhattan a little over three months ago. She'd been there with Jason while he attended a conference. She usually only saw Quinn at Christmas when she returned to Maine to visit her family. Quinn had known immediately that there was something very wrong with Arianne. She seemed nervous and had winced in pain when Quinn hugged her. After some gentle prodding, Arianne told Quinn that Jason had been emotionally and physically abusing her since shortly after they had gotten married. Soon, Quinn and Arianne were meeting regularly, planning Arianne's escape. Quinn had enlisted the assistance of her brother who was now working on a crab-fishing boat in Alaska and living in Seattle in the off-season.

Upon hearing that Arianne was in trouble, he had immediately insisted that she move into his guest room while she started divorce proceedings, found a job, and figured out what she wanted to do with the rest of her life.

Reluctantly, Arianne had agreed. She wasn't close to Crosby anymore. Jason had made sure of that. Arianne shuddered as she remembered a particularly vicious beating Jason had delivered shortly after they were married. Her crime? Hugging Crosby at a Christmas party at the Leveen home in Maine. The attack had left her with four broken ribs, a sprained wrist, and more bruises than she could count. After that, she had been very careful never to speak to or touch Crosby again. Arianne had felt terrible blowing off her friend, but it was an act of self preservation. She often wondered if Crosby hated her for cutting him off like she had. As she gathered her purse and her carry-on bag, she wondered if there was any chance of reviving their friendship, or if he was only helping her out as a favor to Quinn. Only time would tell.

***

Crosby Leveen waited nervously at the bottom of the escalator near the baggage claim area, scanning the crowd of travelers, looking for Arianne. It had been almost six years since she'd married that asshole, Jason, and faded out of his life completely. He never had been able to figure out why she flat out refused to talk to him every year when she attended his parent's Christmas party with her husband. Now he knew. Quinn had told him that Arianne's husband was a piece of shit that had controlled everything that Arianne did. As soon as Quinn mentioned that Arianne was looking to leave him and move to Seattle, Crosby insisted that she stay with him. After all, it sounded like Arianne was terrified and there was no way that he would let anyone hurt her.

After what seemed like an eternity, he caught sight of Arianne and called out to her, "Hey, Aria! Over here!"

Arianne seemed to jump out of her skin at the sound of her old nickname. The only person who had ever called her Aria was Crosby. She turned quickly and hurried over to where he was standing.

"Hi, Cros," she said softly, "thanks for coming to pick me up."

"Hi, Cros? That's the best you can do after almost six years. Come here," he grinned, pulling her into a bear hug. He felt her entire body go rigid in his embrace and immediately let go of her. Searching her sapphire-blue eyes, he saw the absolute fear in them. "I'm sorry, Aria. I didn't mean to scare you. I'm just excited to see you. I've missed you."

Arianne seemed to relax a bit as she pushed a few strands of her long, auburn hair out of her face. She gave him a weak smile, "I'm sorry, Cros. I'm just ridiculously jumpy. I've missed you too."

He returned her smile, "What do you say we get your bags and get out of here? I'm sure you must be exhausted after your long flight."

"That sounds good," she said quietly. "Thanks again for letting me stay with you."

"Hey, what are friends for?" he said lightly as he hefted her two huge bags off the baggage carousel.

***

"It's not much, but it's home," Crosby quipped as he opened the door to his apartment. Arianne followed him into a small, but neat living room filled with leather furniture, bookshelves and a small fireplace. "The bathroom's over there," he gestured, "and the washer and dryer are in that closet off the kitchen. My room's over there," he pointed at another door, "and here's your room. I hope you like it."

Arianne stepped through the door of what was to be her bedroom and stood absolutely still. "It looks wonderful," she said softly. The full-size bed was made up with a beautiful, white down comforter and a number of very fluffy pillows and there was a vase filled with purple irises on the nightstand. "Irises are my favorite. I can't believe you remembered that."

"You wouldn't believe what I remember about you," he grinned at her lopsidedly.

She turned to face him. "You wouldn't believe what I want to forget about myself," she whispered as a single tear trickled down her cheek.

Unconsciously, Crosby raised his hand to brush the tear away, and she visibly shrank away from him. "I'm not going to hurt you, Aria. Why are you so afraid of me?" he asked gently.

The softness of his voice and the obvious concern in his eyes was enough for her. The tears started to flow in earnest. "Quinn didn't tell you everything, did she?" Arianne managed to choke out.

Crosby quelled the desire to wrap his arms around her, knowing it would probably just upset her more. "She told me that you were leaving your husband because he was a controlling jerk. That's all." Arianne cried even harder. "Obviously there's more to tell," he said.

Arianne nodded and tried to regain her composure enough to speak. "Jason was and is a controlling jerk. He also beat the shit out of me on a pretty regular basis. That's why I left him. I was sick of the bruises, the broken bones and the lies I was telling to cover up what was happening."

He was silent for a long minute, fighting the urge to get on the next plane to Boston to kick the ever-loving crap out of Jason Graves. "I'm so sorry, Aria," he said softly. "I had no idea. If I had, he wouldn't be breathing right now."

"That's the thing," she sniffled, "no one knew. I was really good at hiding it and he kept me so isolated from everyone that no one had a chance to figure it out. I was so humiliated that I was letting him hurt me that I kept it to myself. I finally realized that I had to get out before the son of a bitch killed me."

Slowly, Crosby raised his hand and placed it gently on her arm. When she didn't flinch, he looked into her eyes and said, "You're safe now. He can't hurt you any more. I won't let him."

Arianne managed a watery smile. "Thank you. For everything. I don't know what I did to deserve a friend like you, especially with how badly I've treated you for the last few years. I'm really sorry about that."

Crosby grinned at her. "I forgive you, even though there's nothing to forgive. What do you say we order some Chinese, crack open a couple of beers and call this a new beginning?"

"That sounds perfect. I haven't had Chinese in forever. Jason didn't like it," she said, smiling the first real smile he'd seen since she arrived. "Do you still hog the shrimp fried rice, or did you finally learn to share?" she teased.

"I've learned to share," he said, "but the real question is: are you still going to insist on dousing it in soy sauce!"

"You really do have a long memory, Cros," she giggled. "I promise to lay off the soy sauce, if you promise not to hog," she said with mock solemnity.

"Deal!" he chuckled as he dialed his favorite Chinese restaurant.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: *checks between couch cushions* Nope, still don't own anything.

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Chapter 2: Screams In The Night

After dinner, Aria had disappeared into her room to unpack. As she placed neat stacks of sweaters on the closet shelves, she grabbed her cell phone to check her voicemail. She wasn't surprised that there were several from Jason. Sighing, she sat down on the edge of the bed to listen to them and pulled her laptop toward her to make a list of the calls, their dates and times, and their contents as instructed by her attorney in Boston. The first message was from Quinn, checking to make sure she'd gotten into Seattle and that Crosby had picked her up. She smiled and made a mental note to call Quinn in the morning. The second message, as expected, was from Jason.

6:03pm

_You miserable bitch, where are you? I get home and you're nowhere to be found. You're gonna get it when you get home._

The third was from him as well.

6:37pm

_Where are you, you whore? Probably out fucking half the universe. You are in so much trouble when you get home. I don't know what kind of loser would want to fuck you anyway, so I hope he was worth it you slut._

And then the fourth.

7:08pm

_You worthless bitch. I just had some asshole here serving me with divorce papers. If you think you can pull this kind of shit on me you have another thing coming. I swear to God, when I get a hold of you, you're fucking dead._

By the second message Arianne had dissolved into tears, but she dutifully logged each call and then forwarded them all to her attorney. Hopefully they would help him get a restraining order against Jason.

Finally, she dried her eyes, blew her nose and decided that a long, hot shower was in order. She quickly gathered her toiletries and pajamas and headed to the bathroom.

Out of the corner of his eye, Crosby saw her scurry across the apartment and into the bathroom. Moments later, he heard the shower running and he swore he heard deep, wracking sobs coming from behind the closed door. Closing his eyes for a moment, he realized how terribly broken Aria was and all he wanted to do was fix her.

***

Aria stayed in the shower until the hot water ran out, trying to scrub the memories of her old life off her body. As she towel-dried her hair, she contemplated her reflection in the mirror. She shuddered as she surveyed the mass of old, healing bruises that covered most of her body from the shoulders down, and then looked in horror at the pajamas she had brought into the bathroom with her. The yoga pants were fine, but the spaghetti-strap tank top was in no way going to cover up the damage that Jason had done and she really didn't want Crosby to see what had happened to her.

Knowing she really didn't have another option, she slid the shirt over her head and slowly opened the bathroom door. Luckily, Crosby's back was turned to her and he seemed quite engrossed in the book in his hands. Arianne hurried to her bedroom and added a sweatshirt over the tank top before she rejoined Crosby in the living room and he peered at her over the top of his book.

"Feel better?" he asked.

"Much," she answered, trying to stifle a yawn. "I think I'm going to head for bed. It's been a really long day, and I'm exhausted."

"Goodnight, Aria," he smiled. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Night, Cros," she said softly as she entered her bedroom and quietly closed the door.

***

Much later that night, Crosby was awoken by screams coming from Arianne's bedroom. Tossing back the covers on his bed, he hurried across the living room and slowly opened her door. It was obvious that she was caught in the throes of a terrible nightmare. Arianne thrashed around on the bed, screaming, "No! Please, no! I'll be good! I promise!"

He quickly crossed the room and gathered the frantic woman in his arms. "Aria, wake up! You're okay. It's just a nightmare," he said.

Arianne began to fight even more against the strong arms that held her as he tried desperately to soothe her. "Relax, Aria. It's just me, Crosby."

Finally, she broke free of the nightmare and when she finally figured out where she was and who was holding her, she slumped against him. "I'm sorry," her voice quivered, "I didn't mean to wake you. God, I'm pathetic."

"You're not pathetic," he said evenly. "You've been through hell and it's not surprising that you're having nightmares, but you're safe. I won't let him hurt you."

Arianne seemed to relax a little, but tensed up again as he moved to release her and return to his room. "Crosby," she started, but then stopped herself.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Oh, uh, never mind," she replied, feeling more than a little foolish.

"Seriously, Aria, what is it?" he pressed.

Arianne felt herself flush scarlet, and grateful he couldn't see that in the darkness, she whispered, "Would you stay here with me? Just until I fall back asleep?"

"Of course I will," he said softly as she slid over in her bed to make room for him.

Once Crosby had climbed into the bed beside her, Arianne curled up beside him and he wrapped his arms around her. She quickly fell asleep in the protective circle of Crosby's arms. Crosby, on the other hand, lay awake for a long time, thinking about the girl he used to know, and hoping that some part of that girl was still inside her; buried beneath all the wreckage that had become her life.

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When you try your best, but you don't succeed  
When you get what you want, but not what you need  
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep  
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face  
When you lose something you can't replace  
When you love someone, but it goes to waste  
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below  
When you're too in love to let it go  
But if you never try you'll never know  
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down on your face  
When you lose something you cannot replace  
Tears stream down on your face  
And on your face I...

Tears stream down on your face  
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes  
Tears stream down on your face  
And on your face I...

Lights will guide you home  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you

(Fix You – Coldplay)

A/N: I love reviews, so please click the button and leave me one!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: If I owned Crosby, do you really think I'd have time to write fanfic?

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Chapter 3: Off To See The Wizard

The next morning Arianne awoke to find herself cradled in Crosby's arms and her cheek resting against his bare, and she noted, very muscular chest. A faint blush crept across her face as she tried to figure out how to get out of bed without waking him. She had shed the heavy sweatshirt before retiring last night and wanted to hide the bruises before Crosby could see them. That was not to be. The moment she moved, his arms tightened around her and his eyes fluttered open.

"Morning," he yawned sleepily.

"Morning, Cros," she said softly, squeezing her eyes shut and praying that somehow he wouldn't notice the bruises. When she finally forced herself to open her eyes and glance up at him, she saw him staring at her arms with a look of horror on his face.

"Did that bastard do that you?" he managed to croak.

"Yes, he did," she sighed heavily. "I'm sorry you had to see them."

"Why are you apologizing?" he whispered. "Are they just on your arms, or…" he trailed off.

She shook her head. "No, they're everywhere. He was always so careful not to hit me where I couldn't cover it up, but they're everywhere else."

"C-can I see?" he asked cautiously.

Arianne knew that Crosby wouldn't let it go until he understood the full extent of what had happened to her. With another heavy sigh, she sat up, kicked the covers off and slowly pulled up one leg of her pajama pants, showing him a mass of bruises that started at her ankle and disappeared under the pajama pants just above her knee. Then, turning her back to Crosby, she carefully peeled off her tank top, clutching it to her chest. She heard his sharp intake of breath as he gazed at the patchwork of old and fresh bruises that covered her back and sides and clearly extended below her waist. After a few moments, she replaced her shirt and turned to face him; tears sparkling in her eyes.

"I swear if he ever comes near you again, Aria, I'll kill him," Crosby growled.

"Don't," she whispered, "he's not worth it."

***

Later that morning, after they'd both showered and dressed for the day, Crosby took her into Seattle to show her the sights of the city he'd come to love. As they walked along the paths by Elliot Bay sipping coffee, Arianne said, "So, now that we've discussed my life to death, what about you?"

"What about me?" he grinned.

"Well, Quinn told me that you've been crab-fishing in Alaska. Why don't you start there," she laughed.

Crosby told her all about his life on the Wizard and the runaway success of Deadliest Catch. He also confided that his dream was to some day own his own boat.

"And what does your girlfriend have to say about your plans and all those adoring fans?" she asked.

He rolled his eyes and snorted, "Girlfriend? What girlfriend?"

"You mean to tell me that there's not some pretty little thing crying her eyes out whenever you leave to go fishing and giving the evil-eye to all the fan-girls every time you two are out together?" Arianne quipped.

Crosby gave her a lopsided grin. "My last girlfriend, Carrie, dumped me two years ago because of fishing. Apparently she felt that I was neglecting her and she got over that by screwing around with some guy at her office. And as far as fan girls go, why do you think I won't leave the house with out a hat and sunglasses on?"

Arianne's features darkened for a moment and she said, "I'm sorry, Cros. You deserve better than that. So, no one since Carrie, then?"

"Nah," Crosby said lightly, "Every girl I've met since then has been far more interested in TV-Crosby than real-life Crosby. By the way, the Wizard's docked in Seattle right now, you wanna go check it out?" he asked, effectively changing the subject.

"Are you sure your boss won't mind," she asked uncertainly. She'd only managed to watch a few episodes of Deadliest Catch when Jason wasn't around, but she recalled that the skipper's brother had a real problem with the idea of women on the boat.

"I already talked to Keith about bringing you by," Crosby replied, "he didn't seem to have a problem with it. His wife, Florence, is probably there too. I think you'll like her."

"Alright then," she said sarcastically, "I guess we're off to see the Wizard!"

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A/N: Sorry it's kind of a short chapter, but the weather around here is finally being decent and I want to spend some time outside instead of in front of my computer. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed the first two chapters!


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Don't make me say it again.

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Chapter 4: New Friends and Familiar Monsters

As they approached the massive steel boat, Crosby noticed that Arianne was obviously deep in thought, and he had a pretty good idea what she was thinking about.

"Remind you of another boat?" he asked.

"Just a little," she replied with a far away look in her eyes. "It's been a long time."

Once they'd reached the boat, Crosby climbed over the rail to find Keith Colburn and Lynn Guitard on the deck. "Hey guys!" he greeted them.

"Hi Crosby," Keith said as they shook hands. "I thought you said you were bringing someone with you to see the boat. Where is she?"

"She's…" Crosby turned to look behind him and grinned as Arianne landed gracefully on the deck after hopping the rail. "She's right here! Aria, this is Keith Colburn, the captain of the Wizard and this," he gestured towards Lynn, "is Lynn Guitard, one of our greenhorns."

Keith stepped forward to shake her hand as Lynn gawked at her. "So, you're the famous Aria we've heard so much about! It's nice to meet you."

Arianne blushed, "Famous, huh? I don't know if I like the sound of that!"

"Eh, not to worry, he's only said nice things about you," Keith chuckled. "So tell me, how did you learn to hop a rail like that?"

She glanced at Crosby before answering, "I guess Crosby didn't tell you that my father was a lobster fisherman back in Maine. I used to spend a lot of time on his boat when I was a kid."

"Well, come on," Keith gestured for Crosby and Aria to follow him; "I should probably introduce you to my wife, Florence, before she explodes from curiosity!"

***

As they followed him into the galley, Lynn caught Crosby's sleeve and muttered, "Dude, you never mentioned that she was a total babe!"

"Leave it alone, Lynn," Crosby's voice held a warning note.

"Oh come on," Lynn hissed, "I can ask her out if I want to, I mean if you're not going to!"

Crosby paused and faced the greenhorn, "She's married," he hissed, "and you're really not her type, so behave yourself or I'll find a way to make you really miserable next season!"

The greenhorn looked defeated as he turned to head back out on deck.

***

Keith, Arianne and Crosby entered the galley and were immediately greeted by a forty-something blonde woman.

"Hi," she gushed, "you must be Aria!" as she bounced across the room to hug Arianne before Crosby could stop her.

Arianne froze for a moment before saying, "Actually, the only person who calls me that is Crosby. I prefer that other people call me Arianne."

A shadow flickered across Florence Colburn's face before she smiled brightly. "Of course, Arianne. I'm sorry. I'm so used to hearing Crosby talk about his friend, Aria, that I didn't think. I'm Keith's wife, Florence."

Having recovered from her momentary panic, Arianne smiled as she shook the woman's hand. "It's nice to meet you, Florence."

A few minutes later, Florence had shooed Keith and Crosby out of the galley to go pick up lunch for the four of them, leaving her alone with Arianne.

Sitting down at the galley table and gesturing to Arianne to take a seat, Florence said, "I hope you don't mind, but I wanted to talk to you for a minute, without the guys around."

"Uh, sure," Arianne said cautiously. "What's up?"

"How long?" Florence asked.

"How long, what?" came Arianne's confused reply.

"How long did you stay with your husband after he started hitting you?" Florence said evenly.

Arianne's cheeks flamed with anger and embarrassment. How could Crosby have betrayed her by telling complete strangers what had happened to her? Finally, she managed to focus on the words coming from Florence Colburn's mouth.

"Crosby didn't tell me, if that's what you're thinking," Florence said in a calm voice. "I figured it out on my own about two seconds after I hugged you. I volunteer at a women's shelter here in Seattle and I've seen that reaction before. I didn't mean to upset you."

"Oh," Arianne said, her voice threatening to crack.

"I just wanted to know if there's anything I can do to help you?" Florence said, the concern obvious in her voice.

Looking at the woman, Arianne realized why Crosby had thought she'd like Florence. Florence reminded her of her own mother and with that, she had dissolved into tears.

***

Florence Colburn soothed the crying woman and eventually extracted the whole story of how Jason had started abusing Arianne shortly after the wedding, how she'd run into Quinn Leveen, and her eventual escape to Seattle.

"What about your family?" Florence asked. "Have you told them that you left?"

Arianne shook her head. "My father died in a fishing accident about six years ago, right after I married Jason. And my mother was never the same after that. She drove her car off a cliff six months later."

"Oh, my god," Florence said, surprised. "What about your siblings?"

"I was an only child," Arianne choked. "Crosby, Quinn and Sarah are the closest thing to family that I have left."

Florence took a deep breath, "Well then, I think you did the absolute right thing coming out here. If you're interested, I can help you find a counselor to help you through everything."

Arianne dried her eyes and blew her nose. "Really? That would probably be good. I need to start putting my life back together."

"Yes, really," Florence smiled as she gave Arianne's hand a squeeze and they heard the guys returning with lunch.

As the four of them ate, Arianne felt better than she had in months. She even found it in herself to tell Keith and Florence a few embarrassing childhood stories about Crosby, which left him blushing.

***

Later that night, Arianne sat on the edge of her bed, staring at the display on her cell phone. '37 Missed Calls'. Sighing, she pressed the button to retrieve her messages, knowing that there would undoubtedly be some ugly ones from Jason.

12:26am

_You worthless bitch! You're not going to get away with this!_

6:34am

_I don't know what you think you're accomplishing here. I'm not going to let you make a fool out of me while you whore it up wherever you are. I will find you and you will pay for this._

10:45am

_You're going to wish you were dead when I catch up to you, bitch. I don't know how you've managed to delude yourself into thinking you can make it on your own. You're stupid and useless. You're lucky I put up with you!_

After the third voicemail, Arianne was sobbing and Crosby heard her through her closed bedroom door. After knocking softly, he entered her room, gathered her in his arms and held her while she cried.

"Shhh, Aria. It's okay," he said, rubbing her back, "Whatever it is, it will be okay."

Aria cried even harder as she pressed a button on her phone and Jason's enraged voice filled the room.

1:15pm

_You fucking slut. You're dead. I'm going to kill you and everyone you know._

Crosby pried the phone out of her shaking hand and flipped it closed. "He's never going to get to you, Aria. I promise I'll never let him hurt you again."

After she had finally cried herself to sleep, Crosby laid her gently on her bed and pulled the covers over her. As he turned to leave the room, he heard her whimper in her sleep. Without thinking, he climbed into bed beside her and wrapped his arms around her. She immediately calmed down and unconsciously snuggled closer to him. Crosby sighed. He hated what Jason Graves had done to her, but he could definitely get used to falling asleep with Aria in his arms.

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A/N: I promise it gets better from here. As always, reviews are appreciated.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

A/N: Please keep the reviews coming. They make me want to update faster.

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Chapter 5: Is That What You Think?

As spring turned to summer in Seattle, the changes in Arianne were evident to everyone around her – especially Crosby. With the help of the therapist she'd met through Florence Colburn she had stopped being afraid and had taken her life back. Her attorney in Boston had used Jason's barrage of threatening voicemails to get a restraining order which forbid him from contacting Arianne in any way. She finally felt free to live her own life and Crosby was grateful to have the Aria he remembered back.

Aria and Crosby had fallen back into their close friendship as though the last six years had never happened. They were always together; running on the waterfront, browsing the stalls and shops of Pike Place Market, out at bars, in their apartment. Most nights found them falling asleep together in Arianne's bed even though she hadn't had a nightmare in months.

***

One late May evening, Arianne had just gotten home from work when Crosby sprang a surprise on her.

"My sisters are coming to visit next week," he grinned, "and they're staying here."

Arianne squealed, "Oh, wow! That's great! They can have my room, and I'll just crash on the couch."

"Why would you sleep on the couch?" he asked. "You live here."

"I'm not making guests sleep on that couch," she rolled her eyes. "Have you ever tried sleeping on that thing, it's awful!"

"Well, then you're not sleeping on it either," he smiled.

"I'm sure as hell not sleeping on the floor!" she said sarcastically.

Crosby grew serious for a moment, "Aria, why don't you just sleep in my room?"

"I-uh-don't know," she stammered. "I guess I could, if you don't mind and if you don't think it would bother Sarah and Quinn."

"Why would I mind," he smiled, "I sleep in your bed all the time. It would just be a change of location and I really don't give a damn if it bothers my sisters, although I doubt it will."

"Well, I guess that's that then," she smiled. "Now, what are we going to do with them while they're here?"

***

Sarah and Quinn's visit reminded Aria how much she'd missed them over the last six years. The four of them had a fantastic time checking out all the local tourist traps, going to bars, fending off some of Crosby's more rabid fans, and staying up late drinking, playing cards and reminiscing.

One night, Sarah had just finished relating the story of her first kiss after a middle school dance and Arianne was having a hard time containing her laughter. Finally, she gave up and teased, "Joey Thompson? Really? That guy was such a little dork!" Quinn and Crosby burst out laughing.

Sarah, who'd had quite a few beers at this point, slurred playfully, "Well then Miss Arianne, who was your first kiss that was obviously so much less lame then mine?"

A faint blush stained Aria's cheeks and she fell silent for a moment before answered, "Um, actually, it was Crosby."

Quinn and Sarah howled with laughter, "Really? Was she your first too, little brother," Quinn finally managed to sputter.

"You know it," Crosby grinned. "Now, if we're done torturing each other, it is like three in the morning and I don't know about you guys, but I'm exhausted."

The three girls quickly agreed with him and everyone headed to bed.

***

As she climbed into Crosby's bed, Arianne looked over at him and said, "Thanks for putting an end to that conversation."

Crosby chuckled as he tossed his t-shirt on the floor and crawled in next to her, "Yeah, I know exactly where Quinn would have gone with that conversation if I'd have let her, and while I'm not ashamed of the answer to that question, I made you a promise a long time ago, and I'm not breaking it."

Arianne sighed as she rested her head on Crosby's chest and he wrapped his arms around her. "Is that what you think," she asked softly, "that I'm ashamed of what we did?"

Exhaling hard, he paused before answering, "I really don't know what to think, Aria. We never talked about it. In fact, I remember someone not talking to me for about a week afterward. I always just assumed it was because you regretted it."

Tears sprang to Arianne's eyes and threatened to overflow. She struggled out of his arms and sat up in bed, facing him in the darkness. "I never mentioned it because we agreed not to and I was keeping my promise. Don't you remember? It was supposed to be one night and then back to being friends. That's what we decided before it happened. I've never regretted that night, not for a minute. I just don't think your sisters need to know that you and I slept together when we were seventeen!"

A feeling of relief washed over Crosby and he decided to ask her a question that had been plaguing him for the last twelve years. "Why me, Aria?"

"What?" she asked confused.

"You could have had anyone," he said softly. "Why did you ask me to, um, you know, be your first?"

For a moment, she was silent. "Lots of reasons," she finally answered. "Because you were my best friend. Because I trusted you. Because I knew you wouldn't make fun of me for being scared."

When she finished speaking, Crosby was silent as he digested what she'd said. Arianne settled herself back on his chest and asked, "Why did you agree to it?"

Arianne heard a low laugh rumble in his chest before he answered, "Aria, you were my first for all the same reasons I was yours."

She sat up again, "Excuse me? That's a newsflash. I was the first?"

Pulling her back down, Crosby smiled in the darkness, "I thought you knew that."

"Uh, no," she said. "You never told me."

"Well, you were," he said softly.

"Any regrets?" she asked.

"None," Crosby said as he wrapped his arms around her again. "I'm glad we finally talked about this, Aria."

"Yeah," she yawned, "me too. Goodnight, Cros."

"Goodnight, Aria," he said as he pressed his lips to the top of her head.

* * *

So here we are tonight  
You and me together  
The storm outside, the fire is bright  
And in your eyes I see  
What's on my mind  
You've got me wild  
Turned around inside  
And then desire, see, is creeping  
Up heavy inside here  
And know you feel the same way  
I do now  
Now let's make this an evening  
Lovers for a night, lovers for tonight  
Stay here with me, love, tonight  
Just for an evening  
When we make  
Our passion pictures  
You and me twist up  
Secret creatures  
And we'll stay here  
Tomorrow go back to being friends

Go back to being friends  
But tonight let's be lovers,  
We kiss and sweat  
We'll turn this better thing  
To the best  
Of all we can offer, Just a rogue kiss  
Tangled tongues and lips,  
See me this way  
I'm turning and turning for you  
Girl just tonight

Float away here with me  
An evening just wait and see  
But tomorrow go back to your man  
I'm back to my world  
And we're back to being friends  
Wait and see me,  
Tonight let's do this thing  
All we are is wasting hours until the sun comes up it's all ours  
On our way here  
Tomorrow go back to being friends

Go back to being friends  
Tonight let's be lovers, say you will  
And hear me call, soft-spoken whispering love  
A thing or two I have to say here  
Tonight let's go all the way then  
Love I'll see you,  
Just for this evening  
Let's strip down, trip out at this  
One evening starts with a kiss  
Run away

And tomorrow  
Back to being friends  
Lovers...love...lovers  
Just for tonight, one night...love you  
And tomorrow say goodbye

(Say Goodbye – Dave Matthews Band)


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Again?

A/N: I know this chapter is kind of short, but it really needed to stand alone. Keep those reviews coming…they really do provide me with motivation!

* * *

Chapter 6: Think About It

The next day, the foursome split up. Crosby and Sarah headed for the docks so she could see the Wizard and Arianne and Quinn were going shopping and then out to lunch.

"Are you sure you don't want to go with them?" Arianne asked Quinn as Crosby and Sarah walked away from them.

Quinn snorted, "I'm sure. I get seasick just looking at boats and besides, I saw it last time I was in town. I'd much rather do the girly stuff!"

"Alright," Arianne grinned, "girly stuff it is."

The two women spent the morning browsing boutiques, trying on clothes, and generally having a good time. By the time they sat down to lunch, Arianne was exhausted. Their drinks had just arrived when Quinn asked, "So, what's up with you and my brother?"

Arianne nearly choked on her iced tea before replying, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Quinn smiled, "I mean what's up with you two? Are you guys together or what?"

"No," Arianne shook her head. "We're friends. That's it. Why would you think we're anything else?"

"Oh, I don't know, Sarah and were just wondering. You two just seem really happy when you're around each other and…" Quinn trailed off.

Arianne sighed, "He's my best friend, Quinn. Of course I'm happy when I'm around him."

"Are you sure that's all it is?" Quinn asked.

"You don't quit, do you?" Arianne asked, exasperated.

"Ha!" Quinn crowed, "So you're not sure that's all it is! Look, I'm not saying that you two need to get married, have three kids and move to the suburbs. I'm just saying that maybe you two should, um; re-evaluate this whole 'just friends' thing."

Arianne rolled her eyes, "First, it's a little hard to consider marrying anyone when I'm still technically married. Second, once I'm rid of Jason for good, I don't think I'll be looking to dive head first into any relationships any time soon. Third, Crosby is my friend. Even if I did think of him that way, and I'm not saying that I do, he doesn't see me that way. So give it up already!"

"Okay, okay, I get it," Quinn grinned, "I'm just saying you should think about it."

"Can we please change the subject?" Arianne groaned as their food arrived.

"Fine," Quinn assented, hoping that Arianne would at least think about what she'd said, "what do you want to do with the rest of the afternoon?"

***

While Quinn was trying to plant seeds in Arianne's mind, Sarah was busy interrogating her younger brother.

"So, are you and Arianne a couple?" Sarah asked as she and Crosby strolled toward the dock where the Wizard was tied up.

"Definitely not. Why would you think that?" Crosby said, surprised.

"Maybe because I've noticed the way you look at her. Maybe because you can't wipe the smile off your face when she walks into a room. Maybe because she sleeps in your bed," Sarah grinned at him.

"Sarah, you have no idea what you're talking about," Crosby snapped.

"Oh don't I?" she countered.

"Look, I'm happy she's back in my life. I missed her. As far as the whole sleeping in my bed thing goes, it's because you and Quinn are sleeping in hers and the couch is really uncomfortable! And I don't know why we're even discussing this," he said irritably.

"Sure, sure, whatever," Sarah said; waving her hand airily. "I'm not an idiot. I see the way you look at her. Quinn's seen it too. Whether or not you want to admit it, I think you're completely in love with her. Hell, I think you've been in love with her since we were all kids!"

"You and Quinn are both insane," he growled. "I'm only going to say this once: I love Aria. She's my best friend. I am not in love with her. And this conversation is over."

"If you say so," Sarah smiled. "Trust me, little brother, you may not realize it right this second, but eventually you'll realize that I'm right."

"Don't hold your breath," Crosby grumbled.

By then, the siblings had arrived at the Wizard and Sarah let the matter drop as they climbed aboard. Her only hope was that Crosby would realize how he felt about Arianne before it was too late.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I think you've gotten the point by now. I don't own anything. (*wanders off muttering about how unfair life can be*)

A/N: A million thanks to IrishCaptain for letting me borrow Tori for a cameo. I can only hope I did her justice. Please read and review!

* * *

Chapter 7: Life Is Good

After Sarah and Quinn left Seattle, nothing changed between Crosby and Arianne other than that instead of sleeping in her bed, the pair now slept in his bed almost every night. Unfortunately for the pair, Florence Colburn had picked up where Crosby's sisters had left off – questioning each of them separately, on multiple occasions, about the status of their relationship. Although neither told the other about these interrogations, both continued to adamantly deny that there were any feelings beyond friendship between them.

One July evening Florence cornered Crosby, who had been carefully avoiding her all day, as he attempted to leave the boat. "And where do you think you're going, Crosby?" she demanded.

"I was just about to head home," he said. "Aria said something this morning about making dinner together and I don't wanna be late."

"Ah," Florence chuckled, "so you have a date. I won't keep you long then."

"Flo, I've told you about a thousand times, we're not dating," he muttered.

"Keep telling yourself that kid," she said, "maybe someday you'll manage to sound convincing."

"Are you gonna tell me what you want," Crosby rolled his eyes, "or did you just want to harass me?"

"Oh, right," Florence replied; remembering that she had detained him for a reason. "There's a Discovery Channel sponsored charity thing at the Space Needle next Friday night and all the captains and crews are expected to be there."

"Oh," Crosby said, sounding relieved, "just tell me when and where."

"Next Friday. 7 o'clock. Space Needle." she said.

"Done," Crosby said as he headed toward the rail. "Now, I really should be going."

"One more thing," Florence called after him, "It's black tie. And you need a date."

Crosby groaned, "Ugh, these things can never be simple, can they?"

"Ask Arianne to go with you," Florence grinned wickedly. "I'm sure she would love an excuse to get all dressed up."

"You're a real pain in the ass, Flo," Crosby laughed as he hopped over the rail and landed on the dock.

"You'll thank me later, kid," she whispered to herself as she walked up the stairs to the wheelhouse to find Keith. "Hell, you'll both thank me later."

***

That night over dinner, Crosby contemplated Florence's suggestion of asking Aria to be his date for the charity event and found himself feeling strangely nervous about asking her to go. '_What the hell is your problem_,' he scolded himself, '_it's Aria. It's not like it's a real date or something_.' Fortunately, she gave him the perfect opportunity to ask her.

"How was your day," Arianne asked as she picked up her beer bottle.

"Eh, it was okay," he said. "Apparently there's some black tie charity thing at the Space Needle next Friday night and all the Deadliest Catch captains and crews are required to attend."

"That sounds fun," she giggled, "although somehow I just can't picture Keith in a tux."

"Come see it for yourself," he smiled.

"What?" Arianne asked.

"According to Flo, I need to bring a date to this thing, so do you want to go?" he said, feeling incredibly self-conscious.

"I would love to," she said wistfully, "but are you sure there isn't someone else you'd rather take?"

"Nope," he grinned at her, "if you go with me, it might actually be fun!"

"Well then, you have yourself a date," she smiled. "This should be interesting. I don't think I've seen you in a tuxedo since the junior prom."

"That's because I haven't worn one since then," he snickered, "but my date that night seemed to like it."

"Shut up," she laughed as she threw her napkin at him. "I'm well aware of what your date did to that tuxedo and I seem to recall that my date didn't seem to have a problem inflicting similar damage on my dress!"

***

A few days later, Arianne and Florence met up downtown to go dress shopping. "Thanks for coming, Flo," she greeted the older woman warmly. "I have no idea what to wear, so I definitely need some input here!"

Florence Colburn smiled, "Relax, dear. We'll find you something spectacular to wear."

Several hours later, Arianne felt like she had tried on every dress in Seattle. "Ugh, this is impossible. Nothing looks right!" she groaned. "I don't know why I'm even so worried about what I end up wearing. It's not like it really matters," Arianne said as she negotiated her way into a long, tight, sleeveless, midnight blue dress that Florence had passed over the dressing room door. "Well, what do you think of this one," she sighed as she flung open the door.

"Oh, Arianne!" Florence breathed. "You look absolutely breathtaking. I think you found your dress. She stepped aside so Arianne could see herself in the full length mirror.

Preparing to be dissatisfied again, Arianne glanced at her reflection. "Wow, I think you're right, Flo. I think we found it!" she said excitedly.

"I'm sure Crosby will love it," the older woman smiled at her.

"Ugh, Flo," Arianne groaned, "please don't start with that again."

"Oh, fine," Florence rolled her eyes, "maybe one day you two will stop being stupid. Until then, I'll try to keep my mouth shut."

"Thanks!" Arianne beamed at her. "Now, I've gotta find some shoes to go with this thing."

***

The night of the charity event found Crosby anxiously pacing around the living room, waiting for Arianne to emerge from her bedroom and periodically glancing at his watch. "Are you almost ready?" he called through the closed door. "We're gonna be late!"

Her bedroom door opened and Arianne emerged; her auburn hair loosely pulled back from her face and the midnight blue dress clung to every curve of her body. Crosby had to remind himself to breathe as he stared at her. "You look stunning, Aria," he finally managed to say.

She smiled at him as she turned around, "You don't look too bad yourself. Would you mind zipping me up the rest of the way? I can't reach!"

"Uh, sure," he stammered; trying not to notice how much of her back the dress exposed. As he zipped her dress, Crosby thought to himself, '_Get a grip, dude. She's your friend. Yes, she looks ridiculously hot, but keep your hands to yourself and behave!_"

***

Later that evening, the charity event was in full swing. They had politely made their way through a crush of Deadliest Catch fans and were mercifully rescued by Florence Colburn. As twilight gave way to night, Arianne excused herself for a moment and stepped out onto the observation deck for some fresh air and peace and quiet. As she surveyed the city lights twinkling below her she thought about how much her life had changed in just six short months. She'd finally worked up the courage to leave Jason, she was safe, and she had her best friend back. '_Life is good,_' she thought.

Crosby noticed her standing alone outside and went to join her. Without thinking, he wound his arms around her waist as he came up behind her. Arianne squeaked with surprise and then, once she realized who it was, she relaxed and leaned back against his chest. "Hey," she said quietly.

"Hey, yourself," he responded. "What are you doing out here all by yourself?"

"I was just thinking," she said softly as he rested his chin on the top of her head.

"About what?" he murmured, thinking about how perfectly she fit in his arms. _'So much for keeping my hands to myself,'_ he thought.

"Nothing specific," she said, "just that life is good."

"Yeah," he said as his arms tightened around her waist, "it really is."

After a few more minutes, she sighed, "I suppose we should get back in there before Florence sends out a search party."

Crosby chuckled as he reluctantly let her go, "Yeah, I suppose we should. I think I need to make a stop at the bar first, though. Interested?"

"Absolutely," she smiled as she slipped her tiny hand into his and they headed inside.

***

As it turned out, they weren't the only ones in need of a drink. When they approached the bar, Johnathan Hillstrand and his wife, Tori, were also taking refuge there. "Hey, Johnathan. Hi, Tori," Crosby greeted them. "I'd like you both to meet my friend, Arianne."

"It's nice to meet both of you," she said shyly as she shook hands with the two.

The four of them stood around chatting idly for a bit and suddenly a vise-like hand clamped around Arianne's arm. She spun around and found herself face to face with the last person on Earth she ever wanted to see.

"Jason!" she gasped in horror.

"Hello, Arianne. Did you miss me?" the man said in a menacing tone.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded. "You know you're not supposed to be within a hundred yards of me. I have a restraining order against you!"

"I just came to take you home," he said in the same dangerous voice. "I think you've had enough time to think about how stupid you've been."

"I am home," she said icily. "Now, please leave or I'm going to call the police and have them remove you."

Jason Graves reached out and grabbed her by the arm. "You belong to me and you'll go where I tell you to go, bitch! Do you really think some stupid piece of paper changes that?" he said.

"Get your hands off of her," Crosby growled, "or I'll do it for you!"

"Oh, look," Jason sneered, "your little friend is trying to tell me what to do. I suppose, he doesn't want to lose his whore!"

Twisting her arm out of Jason's painful grip, Arianne snarled, "I'd rather be his whore than your wife!"

"You worthless slut!" Jason yelled as he drew his arm back to hit her.

Crosby had seen and heard enough and his fist smashed into Jason's face. The man's head snapped backward from the force and he fell to the ground, unconscious.

Johnathan's hissing laugh broke the silence, "Nice shot, Leveen!"

Crosby ignored him as he turned toward Arianne. "Are you okay, Aria?"

She let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. "I think so, but I really think I need to sit down." Her legs were starting to wobble underneath her.

Crosby guided her to a chair away where she didn't have to look at Jason and Tori Hillstrand approached them slowly with a glass of water for Arianne and towel full of ice for Crosby's knuckles. "The bartender says that the cops are on their way," she said. "Johnathan and I are going to keep an eye on that piece of shit until they get here."

"Be careful," Arianne said, "he's going to be on the warpath when he comes to."

Tori laughed as she walked away, "I kind of hope he does wake up. I think I'd enjoy the chance to finish rearranging his face and maybe add a broken arm to the mix!"

***

It was late by the time the pair returned to their apartment after giving their statements to the police. Crosby was almost certain that she was going to have nightmares that night. '_Dammit,_' he thought, _'she was doing so well and then that bastard had to show up and do this to her. I should have thrown him off the top of the Space Needle when I had the chance._'

His train of thought was broken when Arianne spoke for the first time since they'd gotten home, "Would you mind unzipping me," she said softly.

As he carefully unzipped her dress Crosby noticed the finger-shaped bruises forming on her upper arm. "Do you want some ice for these?" he asked, gently brushing his finger tips over them.

"Could you just stop?" she snapped.

Startled, Crosby dropped his hands to his sides as she spun around to face him. "I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't mean to upset you."

Tears cascaded down her cheeks as she yelled, "I meant stop being so goddamn nice to me! The entire night was ruined because of me! I know you must be absolutely furious with me, so you can stop trying to be so nice already!"

"Aria, nothing that happened tonight was your fault! You didn't make Jason violate the restraining order. You didn't cause him to be arrested. Personally, I thought tonight was absolutely great up until that idiot showed up, so quit saying it was ruined because of you!" he yelled back.

"You're really not mad at me?" she sniffled.

Crosby quickly moved to where she was standing and wrapped his arms around her. "God, no," he said softly. "I'm sorry I yelled."

"That's okay," she whispered into his shirt, "I shouldn't have yelled either."

"Let's just go to bed," he said. "It's been a crazy night and we'll both feel better in the morning."

Pulling away from him just a bit, Arianne asked, "Do you mind if I stay in your room tonight. I don't want to be alone."

Crosby chuckled as he took her hand and tugged her toward his bedroom, "Of course I don't mind."

***

Much later that night, Crosby lay awake as Arianne slept soundly in his arms. She was curled up closer than usual to him and his mind was at war with itself. '_She's my best friend. If something more was supposed to happen between us it would have happened a long time ago She doesn't think of me that way._' he told himself. Sighing, he shifted slightly on his pillow, which, in turn, caused the sleeping woman to press her body even tighter up against him and his warring mind went into overdrive, _'She's everything I've ever wanted.' _he thought. _'She's everything I will ever want._' And then it hit him like bolt of lightning and he couldn't deny it anymore. _'I'm in love with Aria!_'

By the time the sun rose, Crosby had decided that he couldn't go on forever pretending that he didn't have feelings for Arianne that went beyond friendship, but he also didn't want to scare her by saying something too soon. He knew that telling her could, and probably would, mean the end of their friendship, but he had to tell her. He had promised himself that he would find a way to tell her before he left for King Crab season in October. That way, if she wanted to move out while he was gone, she wouldn't have to face him and he wouldn't have to suffer the heartbreak of watching her go. And somewhere, in the very back of his mind, was a small shred of hope that maybe she felt the same way he did and either hadn't admitted it to herself or was too scared to tell him. Either way, he knew that like the ocean tides, their relationship was going to change.

* * *

Hello, tell me you know, yeah, you've figured me out  
Something gave it away  
And it would be such a beautiful moment to see the look on your face  
To know that I know that you know now

And baby that's a case of my wishful thinking  
You know nothing  
'Cause you and I, why we go carrying on for hours on end  
We get along much better than you and your boyfriend

Well, all I really want to do is love you  
A kind much closer than friends use  
But I still can't say it after all we've been through

And all I really want from you is to feel me  
As the feeling inside keeps building  
And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me

Well, how long can I go on like this, wishing to kiss you  
Before I rightly explode  
And this double life I lead isn't healthy for me in fact it makes me nervous  
If I get caught I could be risking it all  
Well, baby there's a lot that I miss in case I'm wrong

All I really want to do is love you  
A kind much closer than friends use  
But I still cant say it after all we've been through

And all I really want from you is to feel me  
As the feeling inside keeps building  
And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me

If I should be so bold, I'd ask you to hold my heart in your hand  
Tell you from the start how I've longed to be your man  
But I never said a word I guess I'm gonna miss my chance again

Well, all I really want to do is love you  
A kind much closer than friends use  
But I still can't say it after all we've been through

And all I really want from you is to feel me  
As the feeling inside keeps building  
And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me  
I think it might kill me

And all I really want from you is to feel me  
It's a feeling inside that keeps building  
And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me  
It might kill me

(If It Kills Me (from the Casa Nova Sessions) – Jason Mraz)


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: They're not mine. Even if they were, I think my husband would get jealous. Then again, it's not cheating if you're at sea…right?

* * *

Chapter 8: Time To Talk

July melted into August and Crosby steadfastly kept his feelings for Arianne to himself, although the task became more difficult every day. Arianne had received a letter from her attorney in Boston letting her know that a court date had been set to finalize her divorce from Jason and that she was required to appear in person. "Do you want me to go with you," Crosby asked after she showed him the letter.

"No," she shook her head. "I think this is one of those things I need to do by myself. You know, kind of prove to him that I can stand alone and control my own life and all that crap."

"What are you doing after that?" he asked; praying that she wouldn't tell him that she was moving back to Boston.

"I don't know," she shrugged. "I really hadn't thought about it. Why? Do you want me to move out?"

"No!" he answered a little too quickly. Calming himself, he continued, "I was thinking of heading to Maine that week to see my family and I was wondering if you'd want to meet me there when you're finished in Boston?"

"Hmmm," she pretended to think about it for minute. "Of course I'll meet you in Maine. I haven't seen your parents in a few years and I'd love a chance to relax after all the inevitable stress Boston will bring."

"Perfect," he grinned. "I'll let them, and those two vultures I call sisters, know that we're both coming."

***

The next few weeks passed quickly and before they knew it, they were driving to the airport. "Nervous?" he asked as he pulled into the parking garage.

"Nope," she smiled. "I'm excited. After tomorrow I'm rid of that asshole forever!"

Crosby grinned at her as he took her suitcase out of the trunk. "And you get a vacation out of the deal!"

"I can take that," she gestured toward the bag in his hand. "I'm sure you have better things to do than hang around the airport with me."

"Don't worry about it," he said. "If you don't mind, I'll hang out until you go through security, then I'll go grab my bag before I head for Maine."

"Suit your self, but you should probably be on the lookout for fan girls!" she teased.

"Shut up!" he laughed.

After she checked her bag, the pair walked toward the security checkpoint and Arianne slipped her hand into his. "Thanks," she said softly.

He reveled at the feel of her soft, small hand in his. "For what?" he asked, squeezing her hand gently.

Arianne smiled, "For everything. For taking care of me when I first got here. For helping me put my life back together. For being you."

"You're welcome, Aria," he said softly, pulling her into a hug, "but you don't have to thank me."

Arianne buried her face in his shoulder for a moment. "I know," she whispered, "but I wanted to anyway."

Crosby's heart was racing as she pulled away from him. He knew the timing was all wrong, but he couldn't help himself. He caught her hand, pulled her back to him and gently pressed his lips to hers.

***

Arianne pulled away seconds later; completely shocked. "Wh-what was that?" she spluttered as a hot blush stained her cheeks.

Crosby was stunned by his own rash behavior. This wasn't how he had envisioned this moment. He had wanted to tell her how he felt when they had time to talk, not while she was rushing to catch a plane and he wouldn't see her for forty-eight hours afterward. "Aria, I …" he began.

"I should go," she whispered. "I'll see you in a couple of days."

And just like that, she grabbed her small carry-on bag and disappeared through airport security.

***

As she sat on the plane that would take her to Boston, Arianne replayed the moment over and over in her mind. '_What the fuck was that all about?_' she thought. '_Why did he do that?'_

When she landed in Boston, she was still lost in thought. As she turned on her cell phone she noticed she had about a dozen missed calls from Crosby and one voicemail. Sighing, she pressed a button to retrieve the message.

2:48pm

"_Um, hi Aria, it's me. I just wanted to apologize for the whole thing at the airport. I really hope you're not too pissed at me. It's just that, um, I think there are some things we need to talk about when you get to Maine. I've gotta go. They're calling my flight. Please call me when you get into Boston…just so I know you made it okay."_

Glancing at the time and realizing that he was still on a plane she quickly sent him a text message so she didn't have to risk talking on his voicemail.

"_Made it to Boston. Hope you had a good flight."_

She quickly hailed a cab to take her to her hotel. On the way there, she turned off her phone, not ready to talk to Crosby at all.

***

Crosby stared out the window for the entire flight between Seattle and Bangor. _'Way to blow it, loser,' _he admonished himself. _'There's no way this is going to work out. You might as well prepare yourself. You've probably destroyed your friendship by being an idiot.'_

When he arrived in Bangor, his sister, Sarah, was waiting for him. "Hey little brother," she called cheerfully. Then, seeing the look on his face, "What's wrong?"

Crosby shook his head, "Everything. I just fucked everything up."

"What exactly did you fuck up?" she asked, concerned.

Sighing, he answered, "Its Aria. I did something incredibly stupid and now she'll probably never speak to me again."

Sarah suppressed a smile. She was pretty sure she already knew what had happened. "And what, may I ask, did you do?"

"I kissed her," he said flatly.

This time, Sarah couldn't keep her expression serious. "Well, it's about damn time," she said.

Crosby looked confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh please," Sarah rolled her eyes, "I told you months ago that whether or not you knew it, you were in love with her."

"Some good that does me," he snorted in disgust. "I don't think she feels the same way."

"Crosby," Sarah said with exaggerated patience, "when did you realize how you felt about her?"

"I dunno," he said, "maybe a month ago."

"And you never said anything to her? Never gave her any indication that you wanted more?" Sarah asked.

"No. I was going to tell her. I just never got up the nerve," he muttered.

"Let me guess," Sarah laughed, "you kissed her and she ran away."

"Yeah, pretty much," he said miserably.

"You've had a month to figure out your feelings," Sarah said. "She had about two seconds to try to process your feelings and her own. Cut her some slack. She probably just needs a little time to think."

"You really think so," he asked hopefully.

"Yeah," Sarah said, praying she was right, "I do."

***

That night, Arianne steadfastly refused to answer her cell phone whenever Crosby called. She wasn't ready to talk yet. She needed time to think. _'He probably didn't mean anything by it.' _she told herself. _'It was just a stupid mistake.'_ The part of her mind she kept strict control of finally broke free, _'God, I wish it wasn't just an accident. I wish we weren't just friends.' _

Arianne shook her head and went to take a cold shower, _'Stop it!'_ she ordered herself. _'Even it I want it to happen, it can't. I can't lose my best friend again.'_

That night, she barely slept. Her mind alternated between fear of the impending divorce hearing and fear of what would happen to her and Crosby when they finally sat down to talk.

***

Meanwhile, in Maine, Crosby paced the kitchen of his parents' home, dialing Aria's cell phone for what seemed like the billionth time that day.

"Leave her alone, Cros," Sarah admonished him as she entered the room. "Give her some space to think."

"I just want to talk to her for a minute," he said quickly. "I'm so used to talking to her before I fall asleep…"

"I get it, so does Quinn, but you need to give her some time," his sister tried to explain.

"Fuck it all," Crosby snapped as he threw his phone on the table and grabbed the keys to the old truck his parents kept for him to use when he was home and stormed out the door.

"Crosby, wait!" Sarah called after him. "Where are you going?"

"I need to be alone and clear my head," he said as he climbed into the truck and slammed the door.

***

The next morning, Arianne Graves sat in the courtroom beside her attorney, listening to a judge declare her marriage to Jason irretrievably broken and granting an absolute decree of divorce.

"Is there anything else before we adjourn?" the judge asked as he looked at Jason, Arianne and their attorneys.

"One more thing, Your Honor," her attorney said, "my client would like to restore her previous surname of Sanders."

"What!" Jason thundered, "Now my name's not good enough for you either, bitch!"

"Mr. Graves!" the judge snapped. "One more outburst and I'll hold you in contempt of court and you can spend a night or two cooling off in a holding cell! Petitioner's motion for restoration of her previous surname is granted."

"You miserable whoring slut!" Jason screamed.

"That's it!" the judge snarled. "Bailiff, take this ill-behaved animal to the holding cells. Ms. Sanders, I wish you all the best of luck in your new life. We're adjourned!"

And just like that, Arianne was completely free.

"Well, Arianne," her attorney said, "what are you going to do now?"

"I'm not sure," she said, thinking of the conversation she and Crosby needed to have, "but hopefully I'll figure it out by the time I get there."

***

That afternoon, Arianne flew from Boston to Bangor, rented a car and drove to the Leveen home in Manchester. All the while, she thought about her friendship with Crosby, the freedom she had gained, and most of all, she replayed the kiss over and over in her mind. _'Maybe Quinn was right,'_ she thought. _'Maybe there is something there. The real question is if I'm willing to risk the friendship for something that might not work out.'_ Sighing, as she pulled into the driveway, she hoped that the answer would come to her after she and Crosby talked.

As she walked toward the familiar house, Quinn and Sarah came flying out the front door to meet her and she knew immediately that something wasn't quite right.

"Hi, Quinn! Hi, Sarah!" she hugged each of Crosby's sisters as she surreptitiously looked around for Crosby.

"Hey, Arianne," Quinn said quickly, "how was your flight?"

"The usual," Arianne rolled her eyes, "bad food, bad service, tiny seat. Where's Crosby?"

"Um," Sarah began nervously, "he's, uh, not here."

Arianne stared at Sarah. "What do you mean he's not here? Where is he?"

Quinn interjected, "Apparently he's upset about something and he kind of took off last night."

"Where exactly did he go?" Arianne asked.

"I don't know," Sarah replied. "We were in the kitchen talking last night and then he threw his phone on the counter, grabbed the keys and took off."

"Did he say anything before he left?" Arianne was starting to look very worried.

"Just that he needed to be alone and clear his head," Sarah said.

Arianne's mind raced through all the places Crosby would have gone and stopped on one. She knew exactly where he was. "I think I know where he is," she said, turning back toward her rental car.

"He said he wanted to be alone," Sarah reminded her.

Something inside Arianne snapped. "I really don't give a damn," she spat. "Your brother and I need to talk about some things and I'm not waiting until he decides to come home. I think we've left each other hanging long enough!" With that, she climbed back into the SUV, slammed the door and roared off down the road; leaving a trail of dust in her wake.

As they watched her go, Quinn giggled, "It's about damn time."

Sarah snickered in response, "Funny. That's what I said to him yesterday!"

"Do you think they'll work it out?" Quinn asked, looking serious.

Sarah rolled her eyes, "One way or the other…yes."

***

As she reached the Manchester city limits and headed North, Arianne thought, _'I know he said he wanted to be alone, but he's the one who started this. He kissed me.'_ As she drove for the next several hours, her irritation subsided and was replaced with a major case of nerves as she finally realized exactly what she wanted. She exited the interstate and began driving down the winding road that lead to the Leveen's summer cabin. Pulling into the gravel driveway, she saw the same truck he had been driving the last time they had been here together, parked out front. She cut the engine, climbed out of the car and drew in a shaky breath.

'_Whatever happens tonight,' _she thought, as she walked toward the door _'everything between us is going to change forever.'_

* * *

Desperate for changing  
Starving for truth  
I'm closer to where I started  
Chasing after you  
I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all I've held onto  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

Forgetting all I'm lacking  
Completely incomplete  
I'll take your invitation  
You take all of me now...

I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all I've held onto  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you  
I'm living for the only thing I know  
I'm running and not quite sure where to go  
And I don't know what I'm diving into  
Just hanging by a moment here with you

There's nothing else to lose  
There's nothing else to find  
There's nothing in the world  
That can change my mind  
There is nothing else  
There is nothing else  
There is nothing else

Desperate for changing  
Starving for truth  
I'm closer to where I started  
Chasing after you....

I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all I've held onto  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you  
I'm living for the only thing I know  
I'm running and not quite sure where to go  
And I don't know what I'm diving into  
Just hanging by a moment here with you

Just hanging by a moment (here with you)  
Hanging by a moment (here with you)  
Hanging by a moment here with you

(Hanging By A Moment – Lifehouse)


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: Seriously?

Chapter 9: Am I Dreaming?

Arianne paused at the front door and knocked tentatively. After several minutes without a response, she slowly turned the knob and pushed the door open. The place seemed empty.

"Crosby?" she called nervously. "Are you here?"

When there was no answer, she made her way to the kitchen and peered out the sliding glass door which overlooked a small lake. Her breath caught in her throat. He was sitting on a small hill with his back to her, watching the sunset, completely oblivious to her presence. She slipped silently through the door and made her way down to Crosby.

"Mind if I join you?" she said softly, already sitting down next to him without waiting for an answer.

Crosby said nothing and took a drink of the beer he was holding. The silence was almost deafening.

Arianne sighed. This was _not_ going to be easy.

Finally, Crosby broke the silence. "Why are you here?"

"Quinn and Sarah said you took off. I was worried," she said simply.

"Well," he snapped, still not looking at her, "I'm fine, so you can quit worrying."

Arianne felt vaguely queasy and tears pricked her eyes as she started to stand up. This was definitely not how she'd hoped her surprise visit would end. "I-I'm sorry I bothered you," she whispered.

"Wait!" Crosby caught her hand and tugged her back down. "Don't go."

They sat in silence for a few more minutes watching the sky as it turned shades of orange and red as the sun slowly sank below the horizon, before Crosby asked, "How was Boston?"

"It was fine," she said with a small smile. "I'm finally free and that bastard is spending a few nights in a jail cell courtesy of his own bad temper."

Crosby looked at her, a look of pure rage crossing his face. "Did that son of a bitch try to hurt you?"

She smirked. "No. He threw a tantrum when my attorney asked the judge to change my last name back to Sanders. The judge thought he should spend a few nights in a cage, like a proper animal!"

Crosby snorted, "I think I'd pay to see that!"

The pair dissolved into giggles at the mental image of Jason in a cage. When they finally recovered, Arianne laid her head on Crosby's shoulder and sighed as he slid his arm around her and they lapsed into companionable silence again.

As much as she hated to stir things up, Arianne knew that one of them was going to have to bring up what had happened at the airport. "You know," she began, "I didn't drag myself all the way out here to the middle of nowhere to talk about what happened in Boston."

"Oh," Crosby said; trying to sound casual as she lifted her head from his shoulder and turned to face him.

Arianne drew a deep breath before she continued, "I came here to talk about what happened in Seattle. You were right. There are some things we need to talk about."

He stared at his best friend. "Um…." he tried desperately to remember what he had planned to say to her when she cut straight to the heart of the matter.

"Why?" she asked, looking him straight in the eye.

"Why what?" he managed to stammer.

"Why did you kiss me?" she said, still not breaking eye contact.

He gave up all hope of remembering the speech he had come up with and decided to just go with the truth. "Because," he said softly as a hot blush crept up his neck and into his face, "I'm in love with you, Aria."

A single tear trickled down her face as she whispered, "You are?"

"Yeah," Crosby smiled at the shocked look on her face, 'I am. I'm sorry to just spring it on you like this, but I had to tell you."

It was Arianne's turn to blush. "So that kiss wasn't just some stupid mistake?" she said.

"No," he said, searching her face; hoping to catch some hint of what she was thinking.

"You really meant it?" she asked.

"Yes, I meant it," he said. "Aria, I don't think I realized it until that night at the Space Needle, but I've been in love with you for years. I've spent the last month trying to find a way to tell you and I've been absolutely terrified to tell you because I don't want to lose you!" Declaration finished; he fell silent, wondering what would happen now.

Arianne's heart was locked in a frantic battle with her mind. _'It wasn't a mistake! It was real! He loves me!'_ she reveled. Then came a rush of fear, _'I can't do this. I just got divorced like eight hours ago! What if it doesn't work out? I can't lose him..not again..'_ And finally, her heart won. _'He loves me. I love him. That's all that matters. The rest will work itself out.' _ Slowly, she placed one shaking hand one either side of his face and whispered, "I love you too, Cros," before she leaned in and kissed him.

When they were finally forced to come up for air, Crosby and Arianne stared at each other for a long moment in the gathering darkness.

"Is this real, or am I dreaming?" Crosby murmured.

Arianne giggled softly, "I was just going to ask you the same thing! I…"

Whatever she was going to say next was lost forever as Crosby's lips crashed against hers. Clothes were quickly discarded as the pair eagerly explored the once off limits aspect of their relationship.

Crosby finally tore himself away from Arianne. "We should probably take this in the house, Aria," he whispered raspily.

Arianne was long past the point of caring where it happened, as long as happened soon. "Cros, there's no one around for miles," she gasped. "Besides," she grinned wickedly, tangling her hand in his hair, "I believe the last time we did this, it was out here too!"

She heard a chuckle rumble deep in his chest as he leaned down to kiss her and pick up where they'd left off.

Several hours later, when the mosquitoes forced them to abandon their grassy hill, Crosby carried her into the house and gently laid her on the bed and they drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, Arianne awoke with her cheek resting on Crosby's chest and his arms wound tightly around her. She yawned and rolled onto her side so she could look at him. The subtle movement was enough to wake him.

"Hi," she murmured, kissing him gently as his eyes fluttered open.

"Hey," he smiled sleepily, "you're still here."

Arianne snickered, "You seem surprised."

Crosby rolled his eyes, "I seem to recall the last time we… um….well, I woke up and you were gone.

In spite of herself, Arianne burst out laughing, "Crosby! We were seventeen and I think my mother would have killed me and my father would have killed you if I would've stayed out all night!"

"I suppose you're right," he chuckled as he picked a few bits of grass and leaves out of her hair from the previous night. "I was just thinking, that some time we'll have to try doing it somewhere other than that hill out back. Maybe in a bed or something."

Arianne rolled on top of him and pinned him to the bed. "It seems to me," she began trailing her fingers across his chest, "that we're in a bed right now."

Crosby grabbed her hips and flipped her onto her back so he could hover above her. "So are you saying you're willing to give this whole 'sex indoors' thing a try?" he smiled lasciviously as her back arched under his hands as he dropped gentle kisses along her collarbone.

Arianne moaned softly, "Definitely."

Later that afternoon, the pair had finally forced themselves to leave the seclusion of the cabin and return to Manchester, knowing his family was probably quite worried about them by now.

"So," she said softly, as he turned down the road leading to his parents' home, "are we telling people that we're not just friends anymore, or are we letting them figure it out for themselves?"

Crosby glanced at her and snickered, "Um, Aria, I don't really think we'd be able to keep it a secret. I seem to have developed a problem keeping my hands off of you."

Arianne blushed as she thought about the previous night and that morning. "You're right," she said, chewing her bottom lip thoughtfully.

"Is that okay with you?" he asked, suddenly concerned that she was regretting what had happened between them. "I mean, we can try to keep it a secret for a while, if that's what you want."

"Is that what you want?" she said, starting to wonder if he'd changed his mind about wanting more than a friendship with her.

"No!" he answered quickly. "If it was up to me, I'd shout it from the tree tops that we're together! I love you. I want everyone to know it!"

Arianne grinned, "Good. I don't want to keep it a secret either. I just wasn't sure what you wanted."

"Aria," Crosby said reaching over to touch her face, "I have everything I ever wanted. I have you."

Tears sprang to her eyes and she whispered, "I love you."

When they pulled into the driveway, Quinn and Sarah came out to meet them.

As Crosby and Arianne climbed out of the car he asked, "Where are Mom and Dad?"

"They ran to the store," Sarah said, eyeing him cautiously. "Mom said something about needing more blueberries for dessert."

"Oh, okay," Crosby said noncommittally as Arianne came around the front of the car to stand next to him.

"So," Quinn began, "I see Arianne found you. Did you guys work out whatever was wrong?"

Crosby wrapped his arms around Arianne and kissed her long and hard, much to the surprise of his sisters. When he let her go, she grinned at Quinn and Sarah and said, "Does that answer your question?"

The sisters burst out laughing at the same time, "It's about damn time!"

A/N: Thank you so much for reading. Please review if you feel inclined to do so – I really love reviews.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: For the last time, I don't own Crosby. If I did, I'd tell you why he's not on the Wizard this season!

A/N: I couldn't help myself. I just had to write this.

Chapter 10: Epilogue

Arianne shivered in the cold darkness of Dutch Harbor and snuggled deeper into her coat as she impatiently paced the dock.

"You know," Florence Colburn teased, "all that pacing isn't going to make them get here any faster."

"I'm aware of that, Flo," she rolled her eyes and smiled. "I'm just trying to keep from turning a lovely shade of smurf-blue before they get here. You didn't tell them I'd be here, did you? I really want to surprise Crosby."

"I promise, I didn't tell," the older woman assured her. "You must've really missed him if you're willing to stand out here freezing your ass off!"

"Flo, I haven't seen him in almost three months. Of course I missed him!" Arianne grinned.

"Well, you'd better get ready to stop missing him, because here they come!" Flo laughed as she pointed to a boat entering the harbor.

As the Wizard approached the dock, Keith caught sight of his wife standing on the dock. She wasn't alone. Smiling to himself, he called over the loud hailer, "Hey, Leveen, get your ass up here!"

"You wanted to see me, Keith?" Crosby said as he entered the wheelhouse.

"Yeah," Keith said, pointing out the window toward the dock. "Can you tell who that is standing next to my wife?"

Crosby's eyes lit up as he recognized Aria and he couldn't suppress a huge smile, "No way! I can't believe she flew all the way up here. She hates those little prop planes!"

Keith grinned, "She must really love you, kid."

"I hope so," Crosby said, looking nervous.

"What's wrong? I thought you'd be happier than a fat kid with a cupcake to see her," Keith said.

Crosby shrugged noncommittally, "Oh, I'm happy. I just …never mind." He turned around and hurried out of the wheelhouse.

When the Wizard finally finished tying up at the dock, Arianne was ready to jump out of her skin. She couldn't wait to see Crosby. Finally, he appeared at the rail, carrying a duffel bag and looking vaguely queasy.

"Crosby!" she squealed as he leapt over the rail, dropped his bag, and swept her into a bear hug.

"Aria," was all he managed to say before she captured his lips with hers. After a long moment of being completely oblivious to the hoots and hollers of his crewmates, she tore herself away from his mouth.

He smiled down at her and murmured, "So, I guess you missed me?"

She flashed him a smile, "Um, that's putting it mildly," she said. And then whispered, "I can't wait to _show_ you how much I missed you."

Crosby chuckled quietly as he stuck his hand in his coat pocket and glanced around.

"Are you looking for someone?" she asked.

"Uh," he stammered, realizing she'd noticed. "I was just seeing where the camera guys were."

"Sorry," she said, slightly abashed. "I didn't mean to attack you in front of the cameras."

"It's not that," he said blushing. "I wanted to ask you something and I'm not entirely sure that it needs to be caught on tape."

"Okay," she said, looking a bit puzzled, "what did you want to ask me?"

Crosby drew a small box out of his pocket, opened it, and dropped to one knee. "I wanted to ask you: Aria, will you marry me?"

"Oh!" she gasped, staring at him. Tears ran out of her eyes as she smiled at the man who had been her boyfriend for all of four months, but had been the love of her life for much longer and whispered, "Yes."


End file.
